I am now and have always been a morning person.
I love what happens when I wake. While I might not actually throw my covers off, jump out of bed, and bound across the floor, I could. The back of my mind hums happily,”Well isn’t THIS great!”
In the morning everything seems possible. No, that’s not it. More like I don’t mind whatever might be impossible. Whatever is, it’s the best. I experience small details as exquisite.
By 3pm or so things change. Worry creeps in. An unsettled feeling, as though my parents might leave me with a mean babysitter. As though I might get lost in the library stacks. As though I might fail to meet someone’s expectations – I don’t know whose.
We don’t have to talk about that now.
I wonder how it feels for you owls. You know they use the term “owl” for night-lovers, right? No. I don’t mean vampires. I mean regular honest to god eat-a-sandwich-with-cheese people. We day types are “larks.” Owls, if your well-being grows throughout the day, how on earth do you ever go to bed?
Here’s an anecdote, maybe useful for larks and owls both.
A couple of years ago I suffered from anxiety waking. It could last more than an hour. Actual tossing, actual turning, misery. Morning people live for a good night’s rest. It’s like balsamic vinegar on strawberries, or salt on caramel. The sweet grows sweeter. I even go to bed at night a tad hungry, so as to enjoy my breakfast as much as possible.
Something had to be done.
So, first, I stopped drinking more than 1 glass of wine a day. That helped. Then I stopped working. That helped too.
But one more thing. I had always preferred a hard bed, until I spent a night at my sister’s. She had long ago made the switch to memory foam.
Fireworks. Albeit all dark, all blue in the dreams of night. I slept without waking for the first time in years.
We didn’t change out everything here at home, immediately. New mattresses are expensive, and I didn’t know if Significant Husband would take to the new feel. One step at a time. We found a memory foam topper at Costco for minimal cost. If we were doing a research study we’d say the sleep data from my sister’s house has been replicated. High fives all around.
One caution, this particular material off-gasses for close to 2 months. Best left in the garage or an empty room, until the chemical smell dissipates. Then rise, and shine. Even shining is better with sleep.
I still wonder, what makes someone a lark versus an owl? But for now I’m going to sit here in my glorious chair and listen to the exquisite birds chirping. Then I might go outside and prune my beautiful hedge and watch the dew shine on the dark leaves of my dear rose bushes. After all, this feeling won’t last forever.