Category Archives: The Death Problem

Dying Out Loud Or Not, Or, Saturday Morning at 8:17am


  This week lots of people, in media both traditional and social, discussed a woman named Lisa Adams. Lisa Bonchek Adams. Lisa is a mother, in her her early 40s, who had breast cancer around 5 years ago. When I first started following her on Twitter, some time around 2010, Lisa was there as someone […]

The Metaphoric Garden Of Our Single Springs


I love my garden. Technically, garden[s] plural, I suppose, as there’s one in the front yard and one in the back. I’ve owned this house for over 25 years. But I have to say, I don’t much care for the Here Comes Spring Again part of the process. So much budding greenery. What if I […]

Out Standing In The Backyard, Or, Saturday Morning at 9:58am


My daughter turned 24 this week. I’ve been trying to discern, through memories, exactly when children’s birthdays begin to make parents feel older. Not when they are small, newborns, infants, babies, toddlers, children, middle schoolers, teenagers, oh, wait. That’s not small any more. It’s so easy to get caught up in the tom-tom litany of […]

Would You Take An Early Alzheimer’s Test, Or, Saturday Morning At 10:11am


I’m out of English Breakfast tea, and putting up with Dragonwell Green. This is not a happy state of affairs. I’ve made tea and toast my breakfast for decades. The tea varietal may shift, a bit, from English Breakfast to Darjeeling to Lapsang Souchong, but it’s always black, and always taken with milk. The toast […]

Old Ladies In Bathing Suits, Or, Saturday Morning at 9:01am


Indian summer this week. Temperatures in the 90s. So yesterday we decided to go to Napa for a few days. Sit by a swimming pool, on a hillside. We leave tomorrow. I’m packing this morning, very happily. It’s not a cold climate, here by the San Francisco Bay. But it does get wet come winter. […]

Things You Don’t Forget


Nienie’s eyes. Share on Facebook Tweet!

Rapture. Toes.


Sometimes as I drive up 101 on the way to work I am seized by rapture. I find life to be a blinding light at which we can rarely bear to look. Sometimes I think about whether I can afford a pedicure and if so whether I should have my toes painted blatant or demure […]

When Does It End?


I was driving to a customer meeting this morning. The sky was not so blue as usual. Jet contrails scudded across the upper sky. The lower sky verged on white. This made me want to cry. Then I passed under an iron bridge. It was so beautiful I caught my breath. You’d think I’d be […]

In Memory


Someone in my extended family died two nights ago. In the middle of the night. My daughter texted me to tell me. It was not a surprise, one of the illnesses that takes people but gives notice. However, he was young. 44, I think. No kids, but had a wife. Those are always the first […]

Job Misplacement = Anxiety


When I first misplaced my job, I was secretly thrilled. At least during those moments when I could put aside the fear of dying homeless in my later years and sleeping under a freeway. I was thrilled because I so looked forward to sitting on my sofa for long, undisturbed stretches of time. But now […]