The Privilege[d] Bumper Sticker. Yes. That’s What I Said.


A couple of weeks ago I received an email from Megan at BuildaSign.com. This happens. Somewhere there’s a big database of bloggers and company marketing departments seem to like sending us emails.  I turn down any asking me to review products, unless the offer includes an extra to give away if I like it. Nice Megan was open to giveaways. I am only obliged to tell you all subsequently if BuildASign did a good job. Which I will do.

But wait. Signs? What, are we distributing billboards now? I do have a soft spot in my heart for billboards. They are part of the Silicon Valley culture. But no. Not today. What occurred to me is that I would like to make a bumper sticker for my mother, a late Mother’s Day present if you will, sporting one of her inimitable sayings.

My sister and I discussed possibilities, as we stood by the side of my niece’s soccer game. As you may imagine, we found the options quite amusing. Family history can be so lovely, especially retold.

I will have the bumper stickers printed in 3 different sayings. The way Build A Sign works, I design them myself – I’m thinking gray on white in a Courier font. But I’m asking you all to help me choose which sayings to print. Below is a poll. Please vote for as many sayings as you like. I will follow your direction, and print the top 3 in the proportions of your voting. High WASPs, as I have said, believe in things like voting, and following the rules.

Megan’s sending me 50, so I’ll have enough for each of my siblings. I expect I will also have enough for and any of you who wish.

Create your free online surveys with SurveyMonkey, the world’s leading questionnaire tool.

Thank you for voting. If  you’d like one, send me an email with your mailing address and you too can tootle about town with Mother Privilege’s sayings on your bumper. Confession, I even snuck in one of Professor’s C’s most deeply held beliefs. The world can always use a little politesse. Including loving and honoring our parents in all their quirks. Have a wonderful upcoming weekend.

EDIT: Apparently the poll doesn’t show up. Let me leave you the choices here while I try to fix the technical glitch.

A Simple Thank You Will Suffice

Oh Fudge!

Quelle Mess!

Five Minutes Early Is On Time

That Behavior Is Not Very Attractive

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43 Comments

  • 05/05/11
    7:02 am

    Reply

    Duchesse said...

    Privilege: Not Just for WASPS Anymore

    Your Driving is Not Appropriate

    You Can’t Have ‘Trust Fund without ‘Fun’

    I Have an Elegant Sufficiency.

  • 05/05/11
    7:12 am

    Reply

    Maggie [The Freckled Citizen] said...

    Oh goodness, I adore this! I couldn’t resist voting for “A simple thank you will suffice.” Nothing seems High WASPier than that. :-)

  • 05/05/11
    7:16 am

    Reply

    Duchesse said...

    Oh no, Lisa, I can’t stop! (These are not meant to refer to your family, but to, ah, certain families of my past.)

    My Other Car is Mummy and Daddy’s

    Hazelden *is* an Ivy League Institution

    De-Democratize Golf Now

  • 05/05/11
    7:21 am

    Reply

    deja pseu said...

    I second Maggie’s suggestion!

  • 05/05/11
    7:21 am

    Reply

    Madeline said...

    No poll to be found :(

  • 05/05/11
    7:44 am

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    Pearl said...

    I like the “simple thank you…” and “five minutes early…” — the second is not only High WASP but a great mantra.

  • 05/05/11
    7:57 am

    Reply

    hostessofthehumblebungalow said...

    I vote for that behaviour is not very attractive…
    I saw a vehicle the other day that was plastered with bumper stickers.

    Some glitch is happening as several times a pop up message came up about java script. not loading…technology came be tiresome at times.

  • 05/05/11
    8:02 am

    Reply

    Flo said...

    The gizmo worked perfectly for me, where do we pick up our I VOTED stickers?

  • 05/05/11
    8:10 am

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    Lorraine said...

    And my own mother’s, “A lady does not chew gum outside the privacy of her bedroom.”

  • 05/05/11
    8:21 am

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    Jan said...

    If the one I picks wins, can I get an extra for our customer service department? :)

    And may I take this opportunity to say “Wow – Lisa said ‘bumper sticker’!” I was was simultaneously tickled and surprised.

  • 05/05/11
    8:47 am

    Reply

    Princess Freckles said...

    I love this!!! Parents often have the best sayings, don’t they? I voted in the poll and it seemed to work just fine! I love “a simple thank you” and “your behavior is not very attractive”. Your mother is going to flip when she sees these!! What fun!

  • 05/05/11
    8:59 am

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    The Preppy Princess said...

    I voted and didn’t think to suggest any others. Mine is so tacky, my mother is aghast any time I say it: “It’s 4PM, do you know where your trust fund is?”

    I warned you.
    tp

    PS: This is a *great* gift idea, very original!

  • 05/05/11
    9:11 am

    Reply

    DaniBP said...

    What a great idea!

    I prefer Quelle Mess!

  • 05/05/11
    9:24 am

    Reply

    ms Givens said...

    “That behavior is not very attractive.” is my favorite. These Okie drivers could use reading that off my new bumper. ;)

  • 05/05/11
    9:35 am

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    CashmereLibrarian said...

    I voted in the poll, but just wanted to note here that I LOVE “That Behavior is Not Very ATtractive.” I say that all the time (mostly to myself–out loud to my boys).

  • 05/05/11
    9:45 am

    Reply

    dbrubeck said...

    First the crocs, and now this. Something has gone terriby wrong in Privilegeville.

    “That behavior is not very attractive” is the clear winner. I am going to practice it now whenever tempted to say…other things.

  • 05/05/11
    9:53 am

    Reply

    Lara in Long Beach said...

    Love the “Quelle Mess!” and “That behavior is not very attractive”. I can actually visualize the first on the currently unsullied bumper of my Volvo wagon. The latter I may insert more into my daily conversations……….

  • 05/05/11
    10:27 am

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    Susan Tiner said...

    That behavior is not very attractive is my favorite.

  • 05/05/11
    11:01 am

    Reply

    vasya said...

    Hi !

  • 05/05/11
    11:30 am

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    Lynn T said...

    SurveyMonkey surveys invariably cause a serious slow down on my computer. (I use Safari on an iMac, reasonably recent and with jacked-up RAM.) I have to stop the process or I’d be sitting here forever looking at one of those twirly things. Unfortunately my local newspaper uses them on their on-line site, so I get to go through this frequently.

  • 05/05/11
    11:41 am

    Reply

    Jen said...

    How fun! We made similar stickers and T-shirts through Cafe Press. Can’t wait to see what the winning High WASP “slogan” will be. :)

  • 05/05/11
    1:32 pm

    Reply

    Marsha@Splenderosa said...

    I think the “vote” worked for me. My favorites:
    A simple thank you will suffice.
    That Behavior is Not Very Attractive.
    LOVE LOVE LOVE this.
    So creative. So witty, Lisa…
    Happy Mother’s Day

  • 05/05/11
    2:02 pm

    Reply

    The Daily Connoisseur said...

    This is hilarious. My vote goes for quelle mess :)

  • 05/05/11
    2:03 pm

    Reply

    the gardeners cottage said...

    what a great idea. i love the that behavior is unattractive. i’d gladly put that on my car or bike, if it fit.

    xo
    janet

  • 05/05/11
    2:36 pm

    Reply

    mary anne said...

    These are all great! They cracked me up. I think my husband would certainly vote for the 5 minutes early one.

  • 05/05/11
    3:21 pm

    Reply

    pigtown*design said...

    “That behavior is not very attractive” should be a big winner! I’d love one, just to let my neighbours what i think. {which is not very attractive of me…}

  • 05/05/11
    3:54 pm

    Reply

    teresa@giudo.com said...

    Choice F- None of the above.

  • 05/05/11
    4:04 pm

    Reply

    the clas factotum said...

    My mom’s list would include a saying that was handed down from her mother:

    Some day you’ll wish you could take a nap.

  • 05/05/11
    4:22 pm

    Reply

    RoseAG said...

    I’m taken back to the Ms. Parks, the middle school band teacher whose motto was “If you’re on-time, you’re late.”

  • 05/05/11
    9:11 pm

    Reply

    Sydney Shop Girl said...

    Oh Lisa,
    I love it!

    I would proudly place you sticker on my car. The streets of Sydney are in dire need of some Privilege(d) wisdom, let me tell you.

    Have a lovely weekend.

    I am getting myself together for the flight over to Honolulu on Sunday – a little closer to you :-P. Can’t wait.

    SSG xxx

  • 05/06/11
    12:57 am

    Reply

    RenaissanceTrophyWife said...

    Hilarious! Love the “behavior is not very attractive…”

    Now for a question or two: Are bumper stickers inherently un-WASPy? Or are these meant to be placed only next to a Marina or Nob Hill parking permit? (first question real, second tongue-in-cheek)

  • 05/06/11
    9:36 am

    Reply

    Alex in DC said...

    Difficult to decide – your mom has such great sayings! I chose ‘a simple thank you’ as it never hurts to be nice and there is enough angry on the roads today.

    Hope she likes it!

  • 05/06/11
    10:19 am

    Reply

    Patsy said...

    You can use my mother’s favorite saying, if you want, “Jesus, Mary & Joseph!!!”

    Happy to be of service, a simple thank you will suffice ;-)

  • 05/06/11
    11:38 am

    Reply

    Lisa said...

    Duchesse – I love yours. Especially elegant sufficiency. That’s what I want in life – now I have the words for it:).

    Maggie – Ha! I suspect you have experience.

    Deja – You got it.

    Madeline – Thanks for letting me know. Hope it has worked for everyone now.

    Pearl – The mantra is my father’s. We always joke, at 3 minutes before the scheduled arrival, Time for Dad!

    Hostess – You got it. Sorry about the technology. I will hunt around for other options as I do like polls.

  • 05/06/11
    11:39 am

    Reply

    Lisa said...

    Flo – Oh you are SO right! Next time. I love those things.

    Lorraine – Ha! And which brings us to ask, why is she chewing it in the bedroom to begin with:).?

    Jan – I know, I know. Yes. Let’s send your customer services dept. several.

    Princess Freckles – Thank you! Yes, we parents don’t even know we’re doing it sometimes. I hope my mom likes the idea. I think she will.

    TPP – Bwahahahaha. And even the term “tacky” is so familiar.

    DaniBP – Thank you. When we say that to eachother, my sister and me, we just laugh:).

  • 05/06/11
    11:43 am

    Reply

    Lisa said...

    ms Givens – I love the idea of bringing this to Oklahoma.

    CashmereLibrarian – I remember it applied particularly well to nose-picking. TMI, I know, but there you go:).

    dbrubeck – Clearly Privilege has been kidnapped by aliens. Phone home. Phone home.

    Lara – Thank you. And it clearly belongs on a Volvo.

    Susan – Oh good! I’m glad one meets with your approval!

    Lynn T – Do you have a preferred alternative? I’m open.

  • 05/06/11
    11:43 am

    Reply

    Lisa said...

    Jen – :). We shall see.

    Marsha – Thank you! Happy Mother’s Day to you too.

    The Daily Connoiseur – Thank you. So happy to amuse.

    janet – on a bike. wonderful.

    Mary Anne – :).

    pigtown*design – Ha! You are right, it’s pulled into the lead:).

  • 05/06/11
    11:43 am

    Reply

    Lisa said...

    Teresa – Well, in another saying, this time from my best friend, “OK, then.” :)

    Class factotum – And so we do:).

    RoseAG – Oh, she sounds like someone from a movie!

    SSG – Aaaah! Let’s go international! And I hope you have an absolutely wonderful time in Honolulu. It’s a great place, Hawaii, truly diverse, authentic, lovely. I hope you take a surfing lesson. Maybe you already know how:).

    Renaissance Trophy – Ah. High WASPs do sport two kinds of bumper stickers. 1) Political. Which they let age and fray when they lose as an I told you so. 2) Animal-loving. “Dog Is My Co-Pilot’ being one of the favorites.

    Alex – A simple thank you to you:).

    Patsy – That has been one of my favorite sayings for years. I will even give you a complex thank you:).

  • 05/06/11
    5:31 pm

    Reply

    kathy peck leeds said...

    I voted for “That behavior is not attractive” since I’ve heard it often enough.
    Also driving in LA, it’s sort of perfect, since everyone seems to be so incredibly rude.

  • 05/06/11
    6:48 pm

    Reply

    Lori @ Lori May Interiors said...

    “That behavior is not attractive” is perfect! I cannot count how many times I have said it to my kids!!

  • 05/06/11
    6:49 pm

    Reply

    Linda in Chile said...

    Dear Lisa, Mr LiC and I like “That behaviour is not very attractive”. The “five minutes early is on time” which would be fine is Australia is definitely not fine here in Chile. One must never arrive earlier than 30 minutes after the time you are told. It is quite usual for people to arrive at 11 when the invitation has been for 7pm. I think that this might drive your mother quite mad. Lindaxxx

  • 05/08/11
    10:19 am

    Reply

    HB said...

    What a tough vote, really. Here are the top three placed in order: A Simple Thank You Will Suffice, Quelle Mess! and That Behavior Is Not Very Attractive

    I pose a rhetorical question: would it be possible to work the word “ersatz” into a bumper sticker? My grandma would be proud.

  • 05/10/11
    11:25 am

    Reply

    Lisa said...

    Kathy – Your favorite won:). Watch out, LA.

    Lori – Then I bet you’ve got great kids.

    Linda – Oh you are so right. This is absolutely cultural.

    HB – We will try, in future projects, to use ersatz as often as possible:).

2 Trackbacks

  1. […] time ago, we discussed bumper stickers with a few choice High WASP sayings. Rejoice. Or perhaps murmur happily and discreetly. They have […]

  2. […] I think I’ll focus on small improvements to our family menu. Next time I host, butternut squash tempura? Maybe sweet potatoes, same method? And we can give up stuffing altogether, fried rice suffices. Like a simple thank you. […]

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